Don't have feelings

If you are told that your feelings don't matter and you have to pretend you aren't in pain

And act like your fine

And if you do show any feelings people tell you that you are you shouldn't act that way or that you are somehow doing something wrong

And you always have to say your OK when you aren't

Then the same people tell you "you don't have feelings" and "your not upset or in pain"

So you are told not to show that you have emotions and then punished for doing as you are told

What kind of cruelty is that

But a far too common story it seems to be for us on the Spectrum

Because it's not just an autistic person's inability to recognize other people's emotions it is also their inability to recognize ours

And for our way of showing them being seen as being to much

Whether it's face tone or body language nonautistic people don't seem to recognize when we have emotions even if we are extremely animated

And frankly some autistic people have trouble identifying their own emotions so it's not that they don't have them it's really that they cannot pinpoint what they are

We often have extreme feelings and difficulties with things that other people consider to be trivial or unimportant

Meltdown, stemming, and shutdowns are all signs of extreme emotions good or bad

And if we learn to react to others feelings the way that people react to ours then we seem cruel and heartless

To some people a long shower is literal torture where as to others it would be heaven

We must all try harder to feel compassion for things even if it is not something that we ourselves experience

And never ever tell anyone that they don't have feelings

Everyone has feelings

even if we don't want to have them

Or know the right words for them

We have them